Letting God be God

You know, I've been a Christian for 17 years now.  But it wasn't until the last year and a half when the Lord gave me a revelation of His Love  that my life has never been the same.  I've never felt more alive, more at peace, more full of joy, more full of hope, more full of promise, and best of all, know Him in a way that is realer than me knowing you.  And although He has blessed me and allowed me to do some things that I wanted to do,  a lot of His blessings has come through ways I wouldn't have chosen.  He sent me to a church where I didn't even like the worship, yet I knew He wanted me there.  I had a decision to make.  Will I follow Him?   So I did.  And He taught me that it's not about whether we enjoy the music, but it's about worshiping Him from our heart. He has given me a heart of worship, so that wasn't difficult, but I really wanted to enjoy the songs we were singing.  He had great healing and deliverance in that little church for me.  I would have missed it if I had decided that where God wanted me didn't fit the list of my 'church requirements'.   And our current church doesn't even have a --gasp--youth group---but He has brought great healing and revelation to my family, and not to mention, some of the best people that I am priviledged to know.  And now, God is leading me in a very big area of my life, an area I have never given Him access to before.  And once again I found myself looking at my list of 'requirements'.  And this morning He reminded me what awesome things I would have missed out on if I had gone by 'my requirements'.   He has been beyond faithful, He is being more than I could ever ask or dream.    Yes Lord, I will follow You, even when I don't understand, even when I am kinda scared of what people will think.  Because You have blessed me so much, and no person, no achievement can touch what You have in store for me.

Whoever Guards His Tongue Keeps His Soul From Trouble

My dream this morning, you know the little one you have after you wake up and then doze back off to sleep for a little bit longer.....

So there I am, I'm standing at what looks like a ticket counter and they give me the ugliest 3D glasses I have ever seen. I look down and there's a cute little toddler that runs behind me, and a young boy comes along and pushes her. Nobody seems to notice, nobody cares. So I tell him in front of his mom: her mom is right there, you need to apologize. So he does. Then in a flash I'm looking in a mirror, combing my hair. My hair was a golden brown, like when I was younger. And all of a sudden I see a battery compartment on my head. I kinda freak out, and I open it and I see batteries in there (at least they were duracell). And I think: I am a doll? Dolls can't breathe! And all at once I feel myself both shrinking and stopping breathing. And then I woke up.

I had to think of what the significance of this doll dream was. Dolls have no feelings, they look pretty, and they are pre-programmed to only say certain phrases, certain words, over and over again. No new thoughts happening there.

The thought of someone being hurt and no one being there to defend them: not only do I care when nobody cares about helpless people, but at the right time (too tired, sick, not enough time with God) thoughts like that happen about me and if I'm not careful, it turns into self-pity. I've grown alot in that area but still have found that if I dwell on that self-pity, hopelessness and regret and depression try to creep in.

And the enemy knows that if he can get us to speak those negative thoughts out, he is going to have a hand in shaping our day. And if he can get a hand in on one day, he will want another and another, til he consumes us.

Proverbs 21:23 NKJV
Whoever guards his mouth and tongue Keeps his soul from troubles.

If we will guard ourselves from speaking these negative thoughts, and instead, remember the good God has done and thank Him and Praise Him for it, thank Him and Praise Him for the Word He has spoken to us, faith will come, and that is what will shape our day, and another, and another, til He consumes us.

Selah~~

Not my impact, but His

So I was reading yesterday...... "BE ALL YOU CAN BE" by John Maxwell. And in it there's a blurb about a missionary who was going to a place that had a history of unsuccessful results. And the guide who was leaving the missionary at his location said, "So, you really think you can make an impact on these people?" And he responded, "No, I think God can."

I didn't think much about it until this morning. I was once again face to face with a frustrating relationship. I've had some frustrating relationships in my life. Things that haven't changed, things that I keep wondering ' Is this ever going to change'?

And then the thought came to me........so, you really think you can make an impact on these people?

And I truly realized: no. But God can.

I need to let God work through me to do what He wants to do on His mission field, in His way, in His time.